There are lots of ideas out there about meditation.
Some people confuse it with prayer, which isn’t a bad thing (I happen to be into prayer). But meditation isn’t prayer. And it doesn’t have anything to do with religion either.
Most meditation practices relax the body and give the mind some refuge from the barrage of thoughts that continually fly through it.
There are many different mediation techniques, but this article is about what’s referred to as concentration meditation.
Maybe you’ve heard people say they meditate by focusing on their breath. Or focusing on a flower, with their eyes half closed. Or repeating a mantra.
These are concentration types of meditation. They are aimed at cultivating concentration on a single focus. No matter which one you choose, it will present you with the same experience. And, once you understand the experience, you’ll understand this type of meditation, and be able to do it.
The big fallacy about meditation is that while you’re doing it, you’re trying not to think, but that doesn’t happen!
The secret to meditation is knowing how to handle your thoughts when – not if – they come up while you’re meditating.
How to Meditate Step by Step (Using breath as the focus, but you could substitute a mantra)
Start by finding a comfortable place where you feel safe and free to be alone.
Find a seat and way to sit. If you can have your spine straight – unsupported — that’s all the better. If you’re comfortable in a cross-legged position, go for it. If you can’t do any of these things, sit in a chair any way you can.
Begin by closing you eyes and taking five deep breaths, in and out, to relax. Then let go of controlling your breath, and resume normal breathing.
Now, what you’re going to do is put your minds eye – your attention — on the tip of your nose: on your nostrils.
When you exhale, say quietly inside your head, “exhale.” And, then, when you inhale, say quietly in your head, “inhale.”
The idea is to occupy your focus and attention by observing and marking your inhales and your exhales.
The next thing you know, you’ll suddenly realize that you’ve been thinking about having the oil changed in your car; what you’re going to wear to your friend’s party; or who can babysit next week.
You won’t even know how long you’ve been thinking instead of focusing on your in- and out-breaths.
This is perfectly normal. One hundred percent normal.
Now, this next part is what makes meditation meditation.
The instant you become aware that you’ve been thinking, you stop thinking your thoughts and gently bring your focus back to your inhales and exhales.
It can be hard to stop thinking: the mind might want to keep solving whatever problem it was you were solving. Or, reliving a good time from the night before. Or fantasizing about an upcoming vacation.
But, that’s what you do: You gently let go of pursuing the thoughts and turn your attention back to your breathing.
This time around, you may manage to mark your breath two or five, seven or 10 times.
Then, just like before, you’ll suddenly “wake up” to the fact that, once again, you’ve been thinking about something else.
And, again, you gently drop your thoughts and turn your attention back to focusing on, and marking, your inhalations and exhalations.
And, on and on it goes.
When you’re ready to stop meditating, let your focus do whatever it wants, and slowly open your eyes. Observe how you feel, and gently ease back into activity.
Resources for Meditating
Personally, I do Transcendental Meditation (TM).
The process is identical to what I just described, but instead of focusing on the breath, the focus is on a mantra. The mantra I was given in the TM training is a two-syllable sound. I don’t know what it means.
Many people do mantra meditation with a word or sound thay’ve chosen that’s meaningful to them. When I learned TM, I needed to invest in the process – psychologically – and have someone guide me through it. I don’t think I could have started on my own. (There weren’t as many resources available at the time.) And, it really worked for me.
There has been a lot of highly positive medical research done on the beneficial effects of TM. I’m sure people doing other types of meditation reap similar benefits.
I don’t do TM as long as is advised: 20 minutes two times a day. But, I’ll tell you that whenever I do meditate, I become deeply comfortable and calm almost immediately. (And I’m pretty high strung.)
But, you don’t need to spend money to learn how to meditate with a mantra. For ideas about choosing a mantra and learning how to do it, I trust this site: The Chopra Center, founded by Deepak Chopra. (I interviewed him for a story once, I’ve read many of his books, heard him speak, and highly respect him.)
Chopra was an early advocate of TM, and has been offering his own version of it, called Primordial Sound meditation for quite a while. More recently, though, he’s been encouraging people to choose their own mantra – from among some suggestions – and simply get started! (See the link in the paragraph above.)
On a practical note, you can use your phone’s timer to ring to end your meditation.
Or, IPhone and Android app stores sell a very popular, free meditation app called Insight Timer.
Its timer has pretty bells and chimes and wood block sounds to alert you to the end of your mediation. It also shows you how many people worldwide are meditating at the same time you are. And it has a bunch of other resources – including many great teachers offering guided meditations. These aren’t concentration meditations – but can be very beneficial. They’re a voice talking you into and through a meditative state.
Happy meditating.
